Digital Archives of the Sacred & Absurd
Martyred on a gridiron in 258 AD, Lawrence famously quipped, "Turn me over, I'm done on this side." In an era of performative suffering, his commitment to culinary-themed defiance remains an unmatched standard of divine sass. We explore the theological implications of barbecue humor.
Patron saint of hangovers and headaches. Before her martyrdom, she endured a period of profound sensory deprivation. Today, we invoke her when the neon lights of the modern sanctuary are entirely too bright.
After decapitation, he allegedly picked up his own head and walked six miles preaching a sermon. A true pioneer of the modern "walking meeting" and absolute refusal to let minor inconveniences ruin productivity.
Thirty-seven years living atop a small platform on a pillar. The ultimate influencer of extreme social distancing. We analyze the architectural merits of his isolated real estate choices.